Walking into this Dave and I expect to hear the same things that we have been hearing all along. "Your name is Beige Julienna Plotts, you are 26 years old, you have Invasive Ductal Carcinoma, it has not spread to the lymp nodes, it is not ER/PR positive, we still dont know about your HER2 results, and tommorrow you will be starting your Chemo regimine of FEC-D that will last six cyles every 21 days for a time of approximatly 4 months." Bing bang were outta there right? WRONG!
November 14th - Exam with Dr. Sasha Lupichuk (my oncologist - aka my new best friend for the next year) at 11:40 a.m. I walk into the room pleasantly surprised with myself for gaining five pounds! In all my life I never thought that gaining weight would be an issue after loosing 140 pounds and STRUGGLING to keep it off. I give myself a pat on the pack and smugly waddle my five pound fatter ass into the exam room!
"Your name is Beige Julienna Plotts, you are 26 years old, you have Invasive Ductile Carcinoma, it has not spread to the lymph nodes, it is not ER/Pr positive, we do have your HER2 results back and those are negative as well. The tumor is smaller than we though it was and surprisingly all of it minus 1 millimeter was removed during your biopsy, this was a shock to us as we expected there to be more there. Given the nature of your tumor and how aggressive it appeared to be before we had your full pathology our medical results indicated that we should put you on the FEC-D regimen and treat this rapidly, however, that is not the case and we now can offer you four cycles of DC or the same FEC-D that we were offering you prior to this"
EXCUSE ME? WHAT?
I did not expect to walk into the exam room today and have to make a decision that again could affect my life...I thought we were done with this when I confidently made the decision to be a professional runner...I mean have my breast fully removed so that if I choose to become a professional runner it would no longer slap me in the face..non the less runner or not...I thought I was done with these decisions then!
So lets weight this choice that I have to make in the next 10 minutes. I have the choice to do the FEC-D which I was offered before for six cycles 21 days apart or I can chose to do the DC for four weeks 21 days apart. I don't quite understand.
The hardest part in making these decisions is Doctors have to go all on statistical information only and absolutely no personal opinions. While I am from healthcare I understand this but its hard to be put in the situation where you are looked at as a statistic and have no emotional connection given towards that decision.
Basically today what triggered my choice and the biggest thing I heard was that FEC-D while yes it is a more aggressive treatment has a higher chance of developing leukemia. The chance of developing leukemia is 0.4% not too scary right? WRONG! that .4% is actually 1 in 100 that can develop leukemia because of the FEC-D.
I'm sorry but are you telling me that I was already a 1 in 230 something women at the age of 26 that develops breast cancer and now you would like me to try something that gives me even less odds and actually role with that? I can almost assume that I would be the lucky number to get that! NO THANKS.
"I am Beige Julienna Plotts, I have been dealt the card of Breast Cancer, I was dealt this because God only gives these things to people who can handle them, people who can take them away and make a difference in their life's as well as others. Tomorrow I will be starting my four week regime of DC and will be on Chemotherapy for the next 84 days. After these 84 days I vow to take an amazing honey moon which I feel my husband and I will be more than entitled to since I had surgery five days after our wedding, and I INDEED will rock that plastic boob on the beach, After these 84 days I vow to make a difference in this world, to do the walks for the cause, to touch other peoples life's as they have touched mine! I am Beige Julienna Plotts, I have Breast Cancer and I am EMPOWERED!"
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