Find a Breast Buddy

Allow me to introduve you to my Brest Buddie.  I have mentioned Brenda in my blog a few times, for those of you not following, I met Brenda the day before surgery in the scintography department of the Peter Laugheed.  When I went into surgery the next day, Brenda was wheeled by me a few hours later after undergoing hers.  We have kept in contact for the last month and just recently had coffee together. 

I urge you all going through this, you may have Best Buddies to pull you through, but there is nothing in this journey like a Breast Buddie.  You will understand eachother, you will be able to laugh together, cry together and complain about your kids together, life isnt all about Cancer, it dosent rule you and it is so nice when you get together with someone who has Cancer in common with you just to find out you have so much more in common! 

Kids say the Darndest things!

My borther Loren and his family came down for my benefit on Thursday and I was so happy to get to spend some time with him, his wife Heidi and their five wonderful kids!  This morning they all jumped in bed with Dave and I and sat there talking for a half an hour until we decided it was finally time to get up.  All the boys left and it was just me and my three year old neice Kas left in the room. 

When I got up to put a shirt on she looked up at me slowly and said "Auntie, yous only gots one boob!"  I said "yes honey thats right I do" and she analized this for a second and said "well thats silly, where the other one is"

Giving thanks where thanks is due!

Kait Dinunzio pulled together many of her contacts and got Ming donated to facilitate From Beige to Pink  on Thursday, Thank you for your ongoing support and efforts in this cause Kait. We had a silent auction and a speech given by my best friend Ashley Spink.

There was approximatly $3,700.00 raised this night to help go towards a few costs associated with my treatment over the next year.

There was a few recognitions that should have been given on this night that were regredibly missed.  It is VERY important to me that I give thanks where thanks is due and I feel that a couple people were not thanked properly or nearly as much as they should have been - Heres to you!

• Ashley Spink - Ashley is a constant support in my every day routines, however during this night she, as she always does, showed up and ran her butt off to do what was needed to make this night a fun and successful time.

• Pauline Graham- Pauline donated many items to the silent auction as well as pooled together members of the Drayton Valley and Buck Lake communities for their donations and support.  Erick and Pauline had many items in the silent auction from the Lakeshore Inn.  During this night Pauline was a huge support and facilitated the silent auction.  There are not enough thanks in the world for the support that Pauline has shown in this cause.

• Kathryn Graham - I have mentioned Kathryn in my blog before, on her 18th birthday.  It was not noted this night that in the past week Kathryn has gone into the community of Drayton Valley and Buck Lake and collected $760.00 from her friends and family to help donate to this cause.  The support that she has shown is very much appreciated and it is important for everyone to know that this is an incredible amount of money for a young woman to raise in the period of a few short days!

• And lastly - Thank you to EVERYONE who donated an item to the silent auction to show your support.  Everything in the auction that was donated was BEAUTIFUL and I wanted to take it all home, however, felt that may defeat the cause!  :)

Surround yourself with Positivity!

You may think this is easy to do right?

WRONG!

Keeping positive people around you when your life is touched with the "Big C" is NOT EASY!  Remember that Cancer does not only affect you, it affects everyone around you and not everyone deals with that the same.  Emotions run high and while people around you should be supporting you during these times, some may find it hard to put their own emotions on the back burner to support you.

Pick your battles! 

Do you want to cry constantly because someone is brining you down or do you want to be the strong upbeat person you know you are and tell them you need some distance?

For me...it almost seemed like I was so afraid to hurt peoples feelings that I choose to suck it up, hold it in until I could get to my room and cry rather than let them know they are brininging me down and hurt their feelings.  Therefore, I choose to sit in my room for sometimes up to 7 hours and cry constantly.  NOT GOOD! 

I really need to work on finding my voice.

Finally...some FUN

My days are filled with appointments, education, training, infromation sessions...blah, blah, blah...there has got to be some FUN here somewhere right?

FINALLY!  November 8th, I visit Compassionate Beauty!  For any of your who have Cancer or know someone who does, please visit this shop, it is simply amazing!  Full of wigs, bathing suits, bras, head scarves, hats, you name it!

My first appointment is with Colleen to get fitted for a wig.  I though this would be fun!  Colleen places the first wig on my head and I immediatly say "I am not ready to do this".  Looking back, I would have never expected this to be my initial response to this "fun appointment".  There is something about a wig though, you place it on your head and instantly get flasshing red lights above you yelling "WIG, WIG, WIG"  

I walked out of Colleen's office with two scarves and called that appointment quits.  I found much more comfort in shopping for my wig on http://www.tidebuy.com/. 

My second appointment at Compassionate Beauty was with Lidia.  Now THIS was fun! 

I GOT MY BOOB!

I like to call it my "real" boob because it certainly is more real that my cotton boob that I gag over constantly, however by calling it my "real" boob I seem to loose sight of the fact that I still have a breast left...oops.  Perhaps this has a lot to do with the fact that I am extremely impressed with this breast!

It is perky and soft and I can remove it whenever I want to go for a super fast run and not be hit in the face by a lump of fat that has its own mind!

Keeping up the Spirits...Mostly

On October 29th, I accompanied my wonderful husband to a halloween party at one of his best friends houses.  It was a blast.  It is important for all of you to know, Cancer is not the ruler of your life, it is not the boss and it is important for you to let it know that.  While some of you may need to make nutrition or exercise changes in your life to overcome this, it is also important to know, those should be part of your daily routines.  This is not a lecture, however, I was almost 300 pounds at one time in my life, and I cannot imagine going through this right now feeling like I use to, no energy, no drive, no sense of sexuality.

While for the most part I am upbeat and happy, I have had a rough couple of days that have got me down, most of which...I blame Dave for!  :)  in a good way...Dave unfortunatly OCCATIONALLY has to leave town for work and those are the hard times on me, the times that I dont feel like sleeping because the sleep is not nearly as enjoyable or warm. 

I have had my two days of bawling my face off and now I feel it is time to pick my ass back up again, start exercising again and of course...blogging!

Wellspring Calgary

1404 Home Rd. NW
Calgary, Alberta
T2N 3T8
Tel:  403.521.5292

On November 1, 2011 I attended a class at Wellspring called Look Good Feel Better.  It was an amazing class that I highly recommend to all women going through cancer.  I clearly know how to do my makeup, however there was alot of information in the class regarding wigs, and most importantly it was an opportunity for interaction with other women going through the same things that you are.  I was the yongest one in the class, however, much like cancer, I dont discrimate.  I dont look at people and notice their age, haircolor, eyecolor, wrinkles, skincolor, I notice the story they are hiding within and I make it my job to hear that story. 

Talking is really all we have.  Leave the treatments to the oncologists, leave the surgery to the surgeons and leave the IV's to the nurses, but at the end of the day, whos going to heal our soul?  WE ARE!  YOU ARE!  I AM! 

Talk it out, be confident in what you are going through, enjoy telling your story and know that it is a part of you now and always, this is what will make you into the person you are still going to become.  This is going to define who you are in the future, embrace it, be proud, LAUGH, CRY, TALK!